Cloverfield

There are not any spoilers here, so you can read through this without fear.

I had been looking forward to this movie since I saw the trailer/teaser when I saw Transformers. The lack of "story" revealed in the trailers was intriguing to say the least. All we knew is that something bad was happening to Manhattan.

I enjoy a good monster movie, with some beastie smashing buildings and generally spreading mayhem wherever it goes. In our post-9/11 world, it is a refreshing break from the human created destruction we see every night on the news. From the beginning of the film, we are brought into a world where something has gone terribly wrong. The film introduction refers to the area "formerly known as Central Park." From this moment on, the suspension of disbelief must begin. While every review has commented on the shaky nature of the hand-help camera through which we view the carnage, all I can say is that while it may be annoying and slightly nauseating, it is realistic. We are treated to some expository footage of friends at a going-away party which serves to give us a minimal back-story about the people we will be spending the film with. Some are cookie-cutter 20-something GenXers, while others we actually kind of like. The laugh from the bodega operator when Lily gets off a pretty good snap at her boyfriend is priceless. After about 20 minutes of watching people drinking and causing drama, the REAL drama begins. The sight of the Statue of Liberty's head sliding down the street is part of the trailer, so no big surprise. What is a surprise is that isn't just a movie about a monster. I have read all of the complaints about how the movie opens up the wounds of 9/11 by showing terrifyingly familiar images of dust clouds billowing down the streets of NYC. I don't think that this was intentionally done to remind us of that day, but that day did show us exactly what the destruction and aftermath of a falling skyscraper looks like. That piece of realism makes what we see in this film believable, because the images of the World Trade Centers falling is indelibly ingrained into our minds. This movie accurately portrays the panic and confusion of knowing that something horrible is happening, but having no idea what it is or why it is happening. Our digital world is fully locked and loaded with camcorders, cell phone videos, and a myriad of other recording devices, so I can believe that someone would want to capture all of this on video. There were times when I wanted to yell "Screw the camera! RUN!!!!" but I can also understand that having a record of what happened would be important in trying to understand things when the crisis is over. The thing that struck me most about the story was the seemingly unreal decisions that the protagonists in the movie make. Many other reviewers have thought that the quest to save his true love was completely unbelievable, but what made me understand it were the little things like the internal struggle we see outside the Sephora store to find a way to recharge the cell phone and the agonizing phone call from his mother in the subway station. The fact that they choose to go on a seemingly stupid and meaningless trip uptown to save a friend makes perfect sense given the fact that when the world you know has just gone to hell in a handbasket, all you want is to connect with the things that you understand. This movie never tells you the answers to the BIG questions, like where did the beastie come from, why is it here, and what the hell happens when you get bitten. The lack of answers is a good thing, because in the case of dramatic emergencies, precious few people know exactly what the hell is going on, and those people, if you find them, are not going to spend the time to explain it to everyone they meet.

All in all, this movie is a short, intense, punch in the gut movie that left me feeling like I had gotten my money's worth. Other than an obligatory full frontal shot of the monster (RAHR!) that could have been left out, this movie leaves you wondering just what the hell happened, much like you would if this had happened to you.

Not mine, but funny nontheless...

An open letter to those under 30

Dear youngster-

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what, with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning ....uphill BOTH ways.... yadda, yadda, yadda!

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!

But now that I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!

And I hate to say it but you kids today, you don't know how good you've got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!!

There was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter...with a pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!

There were no MP3's or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself! Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up!

We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances mister!

We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids' and the graphics sucked! Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!

When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! If a tall guy or some old broad with a hat sat in front of you and you couldn't see, you were just screwed!

Sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 15 channels and there was no onscreen menu and no remote control! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your a$$ and walk over to the TV to change the channel and there was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little bastards!

And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove or go build a freaking fire ....imagine that!

If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot.

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled!!!!!!!!!

You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in the 80’s!

Oh yea, and a seatbelt was Mom throwing her arm across your chest every time she hit the brakes.

Regards, an old fart who knows better than you!

Eyewitness to history?

I'll admit, it was difficult for me to attend the Barak Obama rally today. It is New Year's Day, 2008. Kathy and I got home around 2:00 am, and the rally opened its doors at 10:00 am. I've been a strong conservative for many years. What in blue blazes prompted me to go see Obama?

Early in 2007, I heard rumblings about a senator from Illinois. I watched him flounder in the polls as the early race began, but I also saw that he began to steadily gain ground. I was amazed when he actually passed Clinton in some of the polls. Throughout this time, he continued with the same message, rarely flip-flopping as politician's tend to do. He stumbled and gaffed as the campaign wore on, but he benefited from the fact that this election season started so early. He was able to make mistakes and had time to repair the damage. His message appealed to a Reagan conservative like me. His liberal social policies leave me scratching my head, but after the last 16 years of unbelievable divisiveness and partisan sabotage that has gone on, his message of unity is refreshing. I do not agree with a lot of the things that he has to say, many of them go against my nature and world view. The fact that his last name is not Bush or Clinton is refreshing. When I had the chance to go see him speak today, I simply couldn't come up with a good enough reason not to go.

There is one thing you should know about me. I am a politician's worst nightmare. I think for myself. I listen to what they say, but I also listen to what they don't say. I was just as interested in what he wasn't going to say as to what he would speak about. With some trepidation, I went. We got in Roosevelt High School gym at around 10:00. We were there early enough to get a fantastic spot, directly in front of the dais about 15 feet away. After some preparatory speeches from local dignitaries and Obama staffers, and a medley of patriotic songs by a Roosevelt alumnus who really needed to rehearse the words to "America the Beautiful", Michelle Obama took the stage to introduce her husband. Barak came out with their two young daughters, who looked like they would rather have been in bed than on a stage in Des Moines, IA. It was actually a very touching scene without a hint of "photo-op-ishness" to it. Barak introduced the organizers for his Des Moines effort, and then got into the meat of what he had to say. There were many things that we have all heard in his commercials, the generalized statements that all politicians make about what they are going to do without revealing anything about how they will do it. (If you are not familiar with what Iowa is like when the caucuses are going on, you have no idea the number of commercials, phone calls, ads, and constant politicking that goes on. As I have been writing this, no less than 15 commercials have been on the television. It is truly an amazing, annoying thing to be an Iowan during a presidential election year.) There was the obligatory bashing of Bush, but not to excess. There was mention of the Republican candidates, but only that he was able to beat all of them in the polling numbers. No mention of his Democratic rivals, which was surprising. His message was presented with the cadence of a Southern Baptist minister, very pleasing to the ear, allowing you to understand what was most important by the patterns of his speech. The message that struck me most was not so much the words that he spoke but the passion with which he spoke them. The other candidates seem polished, but almost as if they are reading rather than believing. I did not have the "epiphany" that Barak spoke of, and I am not sure whether or not he is the man this country needs, but his message of unity and ending the polarization that has crippled this nation for the last 16 years certainly struck a chord with me.

During his speech, he asked everyone who is going to caucus to raise their hands. Then he asked if you were NOT sure you were going to caucus for him to raise your hand. My hand was one of few that I saw. When he finished speaking and we prepared to leave, no less than five of his supporters came to me and asked me if I had changed my mind. We spoke of a lot of things, and I was pleased that I was not bludgeoned with propaganda, but I was actually listened to. His supporters are definitely committed and believe in him, but they do not have the shrillness that I have seen from both Republican and Democrat candidate supporters.

I was glad I went. Am I going to vote for Barak Obama for president? I don't know. I still hold out hope that the Republicans will get their collective shit together and a candidate will emerge, but that hope is waning for me. I joked that a Republican supporting a Democrat is like choosing which poison will taste the best, and in some respects it is exactly that. Obama appeals to me as a human being, as well as a man who has the "It" factor for being a President. He acts presidential, sounds presidential, and if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck... It is possible that in November this country will be celebrating the election of our first African-American president. It is equally possible that we won't. If he is elected, I will be glad that I went, and was an eyewitness to history.